Universe??? How about a Red Bull???

You may have heard of it? "The Secret" Men don't want to talk about it because they would probably have to admit that they watched Oprah. People who use it are annoying because... well they have all of the stuff they want (or so they say). Ironically "the Secret" has become so popular it can hardly be called "the Secret" anymore can it? By now you are probably intrigued and wondering, "What is 'the Secret'? and why don't I know it?" BECAUSE ITS A SECRET!

Nah... I wouldn't do that to you. The secret is the law of attraction. Basically to plagarized from some guy I saw on the movie version of "the Secret" it is summed up in three words:

THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS

One of my wife's friends let her borrow the DVD and after about 4 months of it sitting in our home we decided that it was time to escape our abject poverty and 24/7 life of mediocrity only owning two cars, two kids and 2.5 higher education degrees. We popped in the video and started learning from some of the world's most famous (I had never heard of them) visionaries, philosophers, psychics, blackjack dealers, and even one chiropractor. They made a strong case that what you focus on you create in your life. THAT'S THE SECRET! It's not that you CAN manifest the things that you focus on in your life. Its that you DO manifest them. The way they put it is that the Universe is like a magic Genie who only says, "Your wish is my command" and gives you what you wish for.

Example #1:

You - I'm worried that the neighbors don't like the color we painted the house

Universe - Your wish is my command

Result - 24 hours later your house is egged

Example #2:

You - I'm so happy. Why? Because today there is going to be some money in my mailbox!

Universe - Your wish is my command

Result - 3 pm the mail arrives. Pizza hut coupons and two credit card applications included

Example #3:

You - A girl that pretty would never like a guy like me.

Universe - Your wish is my command

Result - Pretty girl falls in love with the guy from example two because he can make ends meet.

See how that works? All joking aside I was pretty inspired by this video but I'm a bit skeptical. Over the past 3 years, training to become a Doctor has honed my mind into a shrewd observer of natural and scientific phenomenon. So I applied the scientific method working under the hypothesis that if I focused hard enough on something it would happen. But it's not just focusing... You have to FEEL it! So knowing that I only had one patient on my schedule for the next morning I then started to feel happy about the fact that I was actually going to be seeing two! I told my wife before we went to bed that night, "Honey, I'm excited because when I left school yesterday there was only one patient on the schedule for tomorrow but I've decided that I'll see two instead!" And wouldn't you know, the next morning I showed up at the clinic and there were two patients on the schedule and both kept their appointments. Score one for "the Secret". Hmmmmm what could I conjure up next? I guess it would be nice to have a building to practice in once I graduate. Universe? How about it? Low-and-behold I jumped on the internet and found a perfect location in a new building that was WAY underpriced! Had I actually done it? Had I unleashed the power of "the Secret"? OPRAH? Oprah is that you, girl?

I called my wife. "Honey I did it! I.... ummm.... (what do you call it).... I Secreted up some... the Universe it..... well..... How are the kids?"

Fast forward to right now. It's 1 AM and I'm supposed to be working an a paper that needs to be in tomorrow morning. So naturally I am blogging. But I'm just so tired and the paper is mind numbing. So here is the ultimate test of "the Secret". I'm just THRILLED that there is a Red Bull in my fridge right now! WOO HOO! Why? BECAUSE RED BULL GIVES YOU WINGS! So how about it Universe? Where's my can of Red Bull? AND MAKE IT DIET! I don't need the extra calories.

But you know... if this works.... if I open the fridge and there's my Red Bull, I'm not going to drink it. Nope. That would keep me awake. Why stay up when I can just be happy that the Universe is going to finish my paper and I'll pick it up from him in the morning? THANKS PAL!

PSALMS 31:6