I.... No WE.... Did it.

You know... there was a time that I didn't think I was worth very much. Those were very painful years. I didn't really have a great reason or anything that I could put my finger on. I just thought that I was generally worthless. This might surprise some of you who know me now, but I used to struggle. It was middle school and the early years of high school. I didn't think that I had many friends. I let my grades slip. I constantly compared myself to my older sisters who I thought were brilliant in every way (about that I was mostly right). Over the years I have tried hard to forget about that sad kid I used to be. A lot of water has rolled under the bridge and many suns have set since those days. I hadn't thought about the former me for a long time. Lately I've thought about him a lot.

I, or it's more accurate to say "we", finished chiropractic school this week. I am now Dr. Jason J. Young, DC. It feels as strange for me to type it as it probably feels for you to read it. Half of my lifetime later that confused little boy turned out to be a doctor. It's a mistake to make it sound like a passive process though. In the years in between I have really been through the fire in a lot of ways. I have worked and sweated and failed and tried again and cried and laughed. But above all I have learned. What have I learned? I think that I've learned, or rather that I'm learning, that I'm not just me.

I am my mother who chose my name understanding its meaning: Jason (Healer) Jamaal (Handsome) Young (Duh... you figure this one out). She says that she always knew what I would become. I am my father who sees in me an heir and has loved me and believed in me from the beginning. He constantly reminds me (not only with words) that who I am reflects on him. Like my other Father, his glory comes with the quality of his children. I am my sisters who not only push me and challenge me, but they lift me up and support me. I am my brother, in who's eyes I can do no wrong. I am my mother and father-in-law who, after welcoming me into their family, took a detour from the course they plotted in life to help care for my family as I was in school. I am all of the friends I have had, even the ones from the period I described as the dark times of my life, the ones I didn't realize then, that I had. I am the hopes and dreams of ancestors who once sacrificed and endured trials so that I could have this blessed opportunity. I am my peers and colleagues who helped me along the way, who laughed and cried with me, or who let me laugh and cry with them. I am my wife who sacrificed just about everything which resembled independance on individuality for the sake of our family and our dreams. I am my beautiful daughters who love me unconditionally who remind me to play often and loud.

There are a lot of parts to who I have become, so far. Above all though, I am the boy from middle school or the early years of high school. I'm that same person. When I finished taking the last final I ever intend to take, I walked quickly to my car at the far end of the parking lot. I had to. I couldn't stop the tears from coming. All I could think about was that boy. I wanted to go back and give him a hug and hold him. I wanted to let him know the he should keep his head up and believe what his parents said about him. I wanted to tell him that he wasn't a loser. That one day people who were suffering, sick, or otherwise afflicted would call him "Doctor". I wanted him to know that he had the power to help and heal them. It's not because of the training, although that is a part of it. It's because of who he is, or who he is becoming.

I want to thank all of you who have supported me and my family over the years. I can't name you all and you may not have thought that you helped. We appreciate it so much. I'm so glad that I was wrong all of those years. I wonder how my life would be right now if I had believed in myself the way some of you believed in me then. That's why I say "we" did it. But what have we done? I'm not sure yet.... this is only part of the beginning.

*****

For those of you who may be curious as to what comes next. I will start my internship in Southwest Portland in a week. I complete that at the end of the summmer. When that is done I will be traveling around the Pacific NW, Utah and Texas as a recruiter for the chiropractic college. In November I take the last part of the national board examinations and when the scores are available in January, I anticipate opening a clinic in Corvallis.

I'm sorry if you were expecting something funny. I guess I was just feeling sentimental and sappy today. I'm going to include some graduation pictures and eventually a video of me being hooded with my regalia. Some of them are really low resolution because I am unwilling/able to pay the $50 the photographer is charging for the high-res copy.

-Dr. Jason Young, DC